I can't. I caaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnn't. I tried so hard, but...Look, okay. How do you stuff steampunk, zombies, New Orleans, and Marie freakin' Laveau in one book and have it come out so insufferably boring? This was not the book I was promised by the blurb. Maybe that's not fair of me, since we're dealing in the Civil War and all of that. But I don't want to read about Josephine going to the aid of her brother or about Cly sending a telegram to let Jo know he's taking the job. I want to read about GANYMEDE, because that's what the damn book is supposed to be about. Why do I have to be past page 200 before we even see the damn thing? And not only does the blurb promise a story that really has not even gotten started as of page 248, but geeeeez, lay off the hyperbole, please. The Ganymede is described as "an astonishing war machine, and immense submersible" that has "killed most of the men who'd ever set foot inside it". I was expecting some epic tale of man versus machine with that description. I was expecting something that looked like the Emerald Weapon from FF7 and went berserk on intruders with killer lasers like the security system in the Resident Evil movie.* Not something that looked like "a nearsighted mechanical whale wearing an oversized pair of spectacles". Ooooo, I'm shakin' in my boots. (Okay, I'm wearing long, slouchy, comfy socks, but you get my point.)Boneshaker (and even Dreadnought to some extent) promised a certain kind of book and Ganymede does not deliver. Call me an immature instant-gratification ADHD brat if you must (though watch your ableism, dude; I actually have ADHD) but I am le bored*That's not as crazy as it sounds. I mean, we're talking a series wherein people become zombies via inhaling a natural gas from an underground volcano. Crazed bloodthirsty underwater mecha isn't really so much to ask.